I’ve found myself in some situations that have tested my faith in ways that I’ve never been tested. I have found myself begging God to deliver me from my hardships, provide for my needs, and make me feel better. I’ve felt defeated, helpless, and unseen by God. I’ve had moments of crying out to God “I know you love me but I don’t feel it”.

What I didn’t know is that being Christian is not about being or doing good things. It’s not about changing my outward actions and behaviors to receive and be in God’s good graces (that’s legalism). It’s not about being controlled because God is not controlling but rather he gives me the choice to surrender control to him (trust him)

It brought me to a question that I had to really sit with. Am I content with God alone? Could I be okay without seminary, without ministry, without success, without marriage, without financial abundance for the sake of knowing Christ?